Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives; the one who seeks finds; and to the one who knocks, the door will be opened. Which of you, if your son asks for bread, will give him a stone?
Matthew 7:7-9
Truly I tell you, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, “Move from here to there,” and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.
Matthew 17:20
Over the past few years, I believe that God has been teaching me about his perfect sovereignty, who I am and receiving faith. It has been a very difficult lesson, which I have been very resistant to learn. I have wandered into some very dark places, but God is so wonderful He has even used this to teach me: To “Love my neighbour as myself” and to lead me away from my belief that I am the purpose of creation, and all creation is here to serve me. This blog chronicles my journey through this and will continue to do so.
So what have I learnt? God is most certainly the centre of ALL things, there is nothing that I can add to this in my own right, nor can I change this. Another lesson that I have learnt is that love really does conquer all things. After loving God with all my heart, soul and mind, loving my neighbour as myself is the second most important thing I can do. Believe me, loving your neighbour is the most satisfying thing you can do, even the ones who are harder to love.
However, my greatest security now that I understand these things a bit better is I know that God loves me. He has continually shown this to me over and over again. He provides when I am in need, even when I am an idiot with my finances and emotions, He comforts me when I am in dark places. He answers EVERY prayer, in the best way possible, a lot of the time not in the way I wanted, but I can honestly say, looking back, God’s way has always been the right way.
Frustratingly for me, He sometimes waited many years to answer my prayers, again, I can say He has always waited for the right time to act. I have asked for things that I was not ready for, and I may have needed training, such as learning how to love my neighbour as myself. But the right answer always comes at the right time.
And this is the point of this blog, All of the things I have been through, good and bad, God has been building Faith in me, that he is the centre of the universe, he is always right and he will provide for my every need. In other words, He is totally trustworthy. I cannot even get close to telling you what a wonderful feeling it is to be loved so much. Now I know that I can sit back in his arms, knowing God’s got my back and there is nothing I can do without him. All of this is a free gift from God and all I have to do is have faith the size of a mustard seed.
This realisation has changed me. I now can’t help but love Him in return. There is nothing I want to do without him. Finally, knowing this kind of love, how can I not love my neighbour. As I have said so often, this all at no cost to me, all I needed was faith the size of a mustard seed (and God gave that) and I know that I really can move mountains.