Again, it will be like a man going on a journey, who called his servants and entrusted his wealth to them. To one he gave five bags of gold, to another two bags, and to another one bag, each according to his ability. Then he went on his journey. The man who had received five bags of gold went at once and put his money to work and gained five bags more. So also, the one with two bags of gold gained two more. But the man who had received one bag went off, dug a hole in the ground and hid his master’s money.
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‘Then the man who had received one bag of gold came. “Master,” he said, “I knew that you are a hard man, harvesting where you have not sown and gathering where you have not scattered seed. So I was afraid and went out and hid your gold in the ground. See, here is what belongs to you.”
‘His master replied, “You wicked, lazy servant! So you knew that I harvest where I have not sown and gather where I have not scattered seed? Well then, you should have put my money on deposit with the bankers, so that when I returned I would have received it back with interest.
‘“So take the bag of gold from him and give it to the one who has ten bags. For whoever has will be given more, and they will have an abundance. Whoever does not have, even what they have will be taken from them. And throw that worthless servant outside, into the darkness, where there will be weeping and gnashing of teeth.”
Matthew 25:14-30
I was talking to my friend and pastor the other day, he was enquiring about my health, I could have just said that I was fine, but he would have known I was lying. So I said:
” I feel absolutely terrible my depression is bad I am struggling to get out of bed….. ….. I feel like the worthless servant who’s master gave him a bag of gold, what I have done with it! God has done so much for me and given me so much, and what I have done, laid on my settee and felt sorry for myself for the last 60 years, I am struggling to go to work. What have I done with any of my life, I was a weak son a terrible husband and an even worse father, and I have not even met my Grand Daughter, and I am a bad friend. I see myself as the centre of the universe and I don’t know how to love my neighbour as myself. What am I going to say to Jesus on Judgement Day, all I can do is hand him back his bag of gold like a worthless servant. “
I still feel what’s the point I have done nothing to justify my existence and on the day of judgement, what do I say to Jesus?
One of my favourite TV programs was a series called “Red Dwarf” there was and episode called “The Inquisitor”.
Not for one second am I even suggesting That Judgement day will be ANYTHING like this, for one thing will we will all be measured by the same yardstick, Jesus. But still everything I have done or thought and everything I will do or think will be/is noted in the the “Book of Life” and I will be judged on it all. Fortunately I will be judged Righteous, because Jesus paid the price for my unrighteous thoughts and actions, for free. And for the rest of eternity I will will be sat with Jesus at the right hand of God.
Even knowing that Jesus paid for me with his blood, and even knowing I will be judged righteous and and I will be seated with with Jesus at the right hand of God, well, I hate to say, that, sort of, makes it worse. The Bible tells us how wonderful Heaven is, there will be no more suffering, there will be no more pain, we will be filled with joy. I want that NOW, if I know am going to all of this joy and feasting why must I suffer through this earthly life first? Why can I not go there NOW? Bring me home Lord!
Usually I end my blogs with a biblical solution, but I can’t seem to find one for how I feel now.
